Frequently asked questions about family mediation

Family mediation is a process in which an independent, professionally trained mediator helps separating people work through arrangements for children, finances or property. The mediator does not take sides or impose a decision. Their role is to help both people have a more structured discussion and work towards practical proposals where possible.

Mediation can help with child arrangements, parenting communication, finances, property, separation issues and changes to arrangements already in place. It is often used where people need a calmer route through difficult decisions without turning every disagreement straight into a court dispute.

No. Mediation is not relationship counselling and it is not about repairing the relationship. It is about helping people discuss and resolve the practical issues that follow separation in a fairer, more organised setting.

Not necessarily. Mediation can sometimes take place in separate rooms, by shuttle mediation or online. The format should depend on what is safe, realistic and most likely to help the discussion move forward.

A MIAM is a Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting. It is a private first meeting with an authorised family mediator where you receive information about mediation and other non-court options, and where the mediator considers whether mediation is suitable in your case.

Usually, no. MIAMs are commonly held separately at first. That gives each person space to explain their situation privately and allows the mediator to assess suitability properly before any later joint session is considered.

In many family cases, yes, unless a recognised exemption applies. The MIAM exists so that people consider mediation and other non-court routes before starting certain family court applications.

If mediation is not suitable, that should be identified at the MIAM stage. This may be because of safeguarding concerns, domestic abuse, urgency, a serious power imbalance or some other reason why mediation is not the right process. You can then be guided towards a more appropriate next step.

Sometimes, yes. In some cases a specially trained mediator can use child-inclusive mediation so that a child’s voice can be heard in an appropriate way. This depends on the child’s age, understanding and whether the mediator considers it advisable.

Yes. Mediation is often used to help parents discuss where children live, when they spend time with each parent, holiday arrangements, routines, communication and other practical parenting issues after separation.

Not automatically. Mediation helps people reach proposals and agreements, but those outcomes do not usually become legally binding just because they were discussed in mediation. Where appropriate, you may need legal advice and further formal steps to give an agreement legal effect.

Often, yes. Mediation and legal advice can work alongside one another. Mediation helps with the discussion and negotiation, while a solicitor can advise you on your legal position and, where necessary, help formalise any agreement reached.

No, not personal legal advice. A mediator can usually give general legal information about the process and the wider framework, but they should not advise one person what the law means specifically for them in their own circumstances.

Costs vary between providers and depend on the type of mediation, how many sessions are needed and whether the case is more straightforward or more complex. The sensible first step is to ask for a clear explanation of fees at the start.

There can be. Some people may qualify for legal aid, depending on their circumstances. In eligible cases, there may also be support through the family mediation voucher scheme, which can contribute towards mediation sessions, although not usually towards the MIAM itself.

If you reach agreement, the outcome can be recorded clearly so both people understand what has been decided. Depending on the issue, you may then choose to take legal advice about whether further formal steps are needed.

Mediation can still be useful even if full agreement is not reached. It may help narrow the issues, make the disagreement clearer and leave both people with a better understanding of what the next step should be, whether that is further negotiation, legal advice or court.

People often choose mediation because it can be calmer, quicker and more constructive than a conflict-led route. It allows both people to stay closer to the discussion and the outcome, rather than handing every issue straight over to court.